Three Kids in a Trench Coat

A couple of months ago, we posted about a research study we’d just enrolled in as a participant; the PREDICTSELF study, on sense of self in DID, at the Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology & Neuroscience (IoPPN) at King’s College London.

We posted about it here.

In that post, we talked about screening & assessment of DID generally – the content of the first in-person session with the research team.

To recap, the goal of session 1 is to ensure that people enrolled in the study as DID participants both a) have DID (natch) & b) are at an appropriate place in treatment, i.e. stable enough, with enough coping skills, to manage participating in the research and any difficult feelings or experiences that it might bring up.

Well, yesterday we completed session 1, and we got an email not long after, asking us back for sessions 2, 3 and 4.

No surprises there – but we were still nervous until after we’d left the building that we were going to get in trouble for wasting their time, that we’d be too much, or not enough, that kind of thing.

We’re so glad the clinical psychologist we talked with for the 3 hour session was so kind & considerate, easy to talk openly with, and that even though it was hard, it all went well.

They’ve really put a lot of effort into co-creating the process with people with lived experience to make it as smooth as possible for people with DID – the experience so far is helping us realise that there’s a lot that can be done to help put people like us at ease, and that’s a super encouraging thing for the future.

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The clinical psychologist we spoke with said she was, “blown away by our ability to talk about our experiences”, but it’s a testament to how at ease she put us that we didn’t just wall up. Also, I think writing this blog has really helped with being able to formulate our thoughts about how to communicate about all things dissociative.

I felt through the whole interview like I should be apologising for not being able to describe things better, but with a little encouragement, we made it through.

We also had a laugh together about how absurd all the questions about, “remembering the things you don’t remember” are in the standardized questionnaires, and how trying to give a single number from 0-10 for questions that different parts are giving very different answers to, is also kind of hilarious (but also – how that kind of thing is helpful to talk about in itself).

The most interesting thing for me was that talking about, “How things are for me overall” was waaay harder than talking about parts xD

So yeah – really encouraged by the first session, and the lab tasks for sessions 2 & 3 sound like they’re likely to be very interesting experiences – I probably won’t talk about those in detail until after the study’s concluded, but still – watch this space!

Until next time, take care of yourselves, kiddos ❤

Riley & fam